ACES Family Academies expands experiences for pen pals
When Pamela Smith, an editor for DTN and Progressive Farmer magazine, spotted a social media post from a friend looking to nurture her daughter’s love of writing, Pam stepped in with an old-fashioned offer: to write letters.
“Her mom posted something like, ‘My daughter came home and said she loves to write, and that scares me, because I don’t like to write. I just thought, ‘Well, all right, she wants a pen pal. I’ll be glad to write to her,’” said Pam, an alumna of the College of Agricultural, Consumer and Environmental Sciences at the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign. She even sent along a children’s writing book to get things started.
What began as a simple note turned into years of weekly conversation with Finlee Schrock, who was just seven years old when the pen-pal friendship began. “It’s all real letters, not emails,” Pam said. “We don’t talk on the phone much. It’s mostly through regular mail.”
In the letters, the pair talk about everyday moments, vacations, and even entire mermaid stories that Finlee has dreamed up.
“I learned more about mermaids than I ever knew was possible,” Pam said. Additionally, their notes often included updates about Pam’s golden retriever, Willa, named for the writer Willa Cather. Over time, the relationship evolved to include occasional visits, which they call "Pam Camp."
As Finlee has matured, so have the activities. Lessons in baking, weaving, gardening, and knitting have all been shared. Last year, Finlee tagged along for a full day of job shadowing at the Farm Progress Show.
The connection between them has become a true mentorship and friendship, one that goes beyond age and family ties.
“Sometimes it’s easier to have a relationship with somebody you aren’t related to,” Pam said. “I had people from my church and 4-H who meant a lot to me. I hope she learns something from me occasionally. But honestly, I’ve probably learned more from her than she has from me. She has to listen to all my old stories, but she teaches me plenty too.”
When Pam received a newsletter advertising ACES Family Academies, Pam immediately thought of Finlee, and wondered if they could attend together.
“I reached out and asked if it had to be your own child or family member,” Pam said. “The college essentially said, ‘Well, I guess not.’ So, I gave it to Finlee as a Christmas present.”
For Finlee, now 11, the decision meant giving up something important to her: attending her county fair. “She made a pretty big sacrifice to go,” Pam said. “But I never saw her complain. We make trade-offs in life, and that’s sometimes hard, but it’s a learning thing, too.”
For Finlee, the experience was worth it. “I really liked how you got to experience the whole campus,” she said. “All the classes were fun, but the plant science [class] was probably my favorite.”
During their time at AFA, Finlee and Pam got to brew tea with herbs in a plant science class, explore the biology labs, test out meat science, and even try an air fryer cooking class.
Experiencing dorm life brought its own challenges. “We walked in, and they had a loft bed,” Pam said. “I thought, ‘Oh no.’”
Finlee laughed as she remembered their solution: “We pulled her mattress off the bed and put it on the floor.”
For Pam, the moment brought her back to her academic experience at the U. of I. “It’s been 50 years since I had to decide, ‘Can I get back in time to eat and still make it to class?’ Being there with Finlee was like reliving those first steps on campus again.”
Experiences like AFA give Finlee a glimpse of college life through balancing classes, dining halls, and friendships, which will help her prepare for life ahead.
For Pam, that’s what makes their pen-pal journey so rewarding: seeing a young person discover new possibilities. “You can see she’s making friends and finding her way,” Pam said. “And that’s the best part — watching her step into her own story.”
AFA will return to campus July 8-10, 2026. ACES alumni and youth ages 8-13 are invited to register by 11:45 p.m. on June 7.